Sick

I dont know what came to me that Ive been sick for the past few days. I have this stomachache that wont go away no matter how many pills Ive swallowed :( I went to see the doctor on Monday, they ran a blood test on me. Turns out my white blood cell is slightly higher than normal. So they treated me as infection. Gave me cephalexin and famotidine.

But that night, I was crying hard as my tummy still ache and I feel nauseated. So the next day, my dad sent me to hospital because I just cant tolerate this pain anymore. They tested my urine but nothing seemed to be serious with it. So they injected me (again, since the day before I dealt with needles to take my blood, urghhh) in order to reduce my pain. But the moment that the medicine kicked in, I felt nauseated, dizziness as any second I will be collapsed and had this not-comfortable-feeling in my tummy. I requested to the doctor to go home.

They gave me paracetamol and antacid. 

And here I am, still dealing with i-dont-know-what-is-wrong-with-my-tummy. The pain is gone but my tummy still feel bloated. Almost all the time I feel nauseated (not because I am pregnant!!!!) and one time I throw up. Gave up my appetite and I lost 2 kg without doing anything :(((((((

"and when i fall ill ,He (Allah) is the one who cures me"

Surah Ash-shu`ara,verse 80

New Year New Me? Cliche

Talk about my last post, eventually the company called me for the second interview *heartbroken*. I tried to be nice and rejected it without to offence the HR lady, but it turns out she feel offended. And ended the call with cold and sudden tutt. Sobs. Even HR couldn't accept rejection as everybody else.

Well, move on as it is 2017 and my birthday is coming soon! *giving hints*. I think I have been a better person than I was years ago, hopefully. I really aim to be better than this too in the future. InsyaAllah. 

One big step that I took last year is to wear socks to whenever I go. It is kind of awkward when you still love your skinny jeans and you wanted to wear socks to cover your aurah. But being me, well I just go with my guts. I wear them both lolololol. I know I am not perfect but I also trying to find my identity. This action hasn't been driven by anyone else, or being forced (like rules in MRSM), it come out from me since... idk, a long time ago but I didn't have the balls to do it. 

This feeling when I first started wearing socks is I feel protected, even at this time I still wearing my skinny jeans (not completely cover my aurah) but those feeling when you obey a little rules by your God, I feel blessed. I really hope that in the future, I am ready to let go my skinny jeans and started to completely cover my aurah. Please don't judge because everyone has been struggling differently and that doesn't make them bad, I do too. I sinned a lot and try to repent myself but by giving bad perception doesn't make me stronger. When scrolling down my media social, I always come across the one that being all ignorant like they're always right and being all judgmental. When they see someone without their hijab, they called her munafikin, when they see a parent scolding their children, they called them uneducated, when they see someone had been through a lot, they told them that they had sinned a lot too and must seek for forgiveness. 

Please stop judging!

Everyone has gone through different struggle and none of them you can handle if it is not meant for you. I always told myself not to judge them because sometimes the worst person can turn out to be better than you. I witnessed this a lot. 

That is why sometimes I like to be away from medial social as much as I can (Not to mention my phone is completely broken). Anyhow, I used to be someone who judge and also someone who LOVEEEEE to share everything. By I mean everything, I literally means every second, my love life, me watching tv or something that offend someone. I am trying to reduce all of that, and focusing the good in everyone also everything. Whatever bad things they had done, there're always good deep within them.

Lets spread positivity and happy upcoming TWENTY FOURTH!!!!! to me.

Job Interview

Hi, Im still unemployed for how many months now? (sarcastic to myself, huhuhu)

Well, in this post I would like to share my experience in the job interview, basically Ive gone to two interviews for now. It went well for both of it, but the fact that I didn't get callback from the first company is quite frustrating :( I wanted to share my experience for the second company;

I submitted my application through jobstreet under sales executive because I wanted to try different position than my current course, especially when they're looking for engineering fresh graduates. Approximately 2 weeks after that I received a call from HR at late evening about 6 pm asking if I still interested for the position, we chit chat a little bit, more like a simple interview asking what Im currently doing, do I posses my own transport, can I change from mechanical (my course) to sales etc. It ended like 15 minutes and she would love to proceed my resume to the hiring manager and if I were shortlisted, she would give me a call.

So another weeks goes by and I forget about the call. And on the Wednesday (a week after that), she called me to arrange an interview. Since I will be attending an autocad class in Shah Alam on Saturday, so I agreed to do the interview on Friday. I didn't give much thought on it, and say yes. Apparently, after that is a bit hustle since I had to re-planned my activity and on Thursday (the next day) my dad and I went to Shah Alam and rented a hotel there. I was rushing to pack, study for the interview, and even the night before the interview I had a cramp and slept at 9 pm. It had been the first time after so long I slept early. The earliest bedtime I went to is at 12 am. lol. 

Next day, after we had breakfast at the hotel, we went to puchong since my interview will be at 11 am. We arrived at 10.40 am, had to wait for awhile then a guy that I claimed to be the hiring manager entered the room. Like always, he examined my resume and certificates and asked me to introduce myself. All is well until he asked me to explain sales in malay. At first I explained sales in english and it was okay. When he wanted me to speak malay, I asked him whether my english is that bad? But he replied that my english is so good (flattered) that he wanted me to speak in Malay. He afraid that I cant speak Malay since I will be dealing with a lot of Malay customers/ clients. This is where I screwed up :( I cant even give definition of sales in Malay, like come on Im not an englishman. I eat nasi lemak, tempoyak and even budu! At that time I felt hopeless. I explained to him that my syllabus in university is in english and it is complicated for me to explain the term in Malay even I know it. What shocked to me is that, he thought that uitm syllabus is in Malay. This is why so many people downgraded uitm.

After that, we talked like a normal conversation and for me it didn't feel like an interview as we being comfortable with each other. The interview ended for about 40 minutes and I can assure you that I nailed it. BUT!

My dad didn't approve it as this job requires me to travel and meet a lot of people (I just didn't understand what is wrong with meeting people??). Also the location is not safe and the company doesn't look professional. This is why people shouldn't bring your parent to the interview lol. I really wanted to experience the job as the salary is quite demanding, but being an obedient daughter, I have to admit to my dad's decision.

After I settled the weekend, I didn't give a thank you email to the HR (sorry :( ) and didn't callback the company for the feedback. It was intentional so I wouldn't give them hope in getting the job. I didn't want to be rude, but also I didn't want to let them down. Maybe they will meet other suitable candidates. I really hope that they didn't call me because I will feel guilty. 

Now back to zero, finding other jobs that suits my dad's requirement. lol.